I’m scared of being hurt.

I’m terrified of love.

Those 3 fears have built walls around my heart, leading to my inexplicable flings. My reasoning for those, well a simple line I tell myself when I’ve regretted the night before, a girl’s got needs! Telling myself that keeps me from kicking my own ass in the morning. But I know in this situation, it was simply last nights attraction and nothing to commit to. Now don’t get the wrong idea, I’ve had sex with a total of 2 guys, the guys at the party that are random flings and I have zero feelings for, but like I said, a girl has needs. I’d like to consider myself anything but a whore but why is it that I so freely hook up with these guys, but when a good guy actually calls me and is interested in anything more than being friends, I scare away? I tell myself I don’t like them and find everything wrong with them I can. Once I find those bad qualities, I tell my friends, my friends laugh and agree that I shouldn’t like the guy, and then that settles it. They are out of my life. One day I hope to settle whatever is going on with me, and let someone in, love someone whoever it may be, and end these inexplicable flings.